I'm with ben, he's my boyfriend, I think we both know we won't last. Knowing that we don't work well living together is the real dinger... It's just that he feels like I'm the only one he can trust. He's respecting boundaries. He moved out and is living in his mom's office. He wants to get education either from Redwood, M-A, or Night School. We're both special to one another and we're doing spectacular together. He feels safer with me than blindly out in the world fucking anyone who let's him live in their home.

I have no real problem with it but he take a majority of my time which I'd like to spend with other people too.

My room is remaining neat and clean, everything has a place and is being kept there. The asshole below me is sensitive to every itty bitty noise that comes through the floor boards, he almost got me evicted when I was trying to clean one night, he happened to have insomnia and blamed me, he also just moved in on the 15th of October. I talked to the land lord, I wrote him a letter, ended up meeting him and everything is peachy keen now... as long as I get to my bed without making a peep at night.
If he complains during the day, I don't give a flying fuck. There is no ordinance during the day so he can't do shit. All I do is walk around and clean my shit, the closet opens, closes, drawers open, close, I kneel down and hit the floor with my knee. It's the afternoon, he bangs on his ceiling, I'm not playing obnoxiously loud music, the landlord is on my side, this guy is a nut. I'm trying to live, he's being the anal prick.

I'm getting more into my religion, I want to join a synagogue. There are two in Palo Alto, about twenty percent of Palo Alto is Jewish, you'll see orthodox jews, in all black, walking around every Friday in some nieghborhoods.
One of the first things I want to do is get a Birkat HaBayit:

Birchat Ha'Bayit
Be'zeh ha'shaar lo ya'voh tzaar
Be'zot ha'deerah lo ta'voh tzarrah
Be'zot ha'delet lo ta'voh ba'halah
Be'zot ha'machlaka lo tavoh machloket
Be'zeh ha'makom te'hee bracha
v'shalom

It's a specific prayer, and the casing it is in hangs diagonally on the side of the entrance. It blesses the home, my dad has one and this is the translation in english:

Blessing for the Home,
Let no sadness come through this gate,
Let no trouble come to this dwelling,
Let no fear come through this door,
Let no conflict be in this place,
Let this home be filled with the blessing of joy,
and peace.

If not a blessing from god, it is blessing none the less.

I also want to learn basic prayers for everyday tasks, there is one for traveling that I want to learn before I go to detroit for my brother's graduation. Who knows, I could become a rabbi.

Ciao,
danny

Chris Crocker has inspired me to buy a video camera and express my bull shit... because I am full of it and my seams are protruding and showing themselves from the lack of venting it... A lot of people are full of shit... I can say every human being is full of shit because that is what is magical in being a human.

I am human,
Full of shit,
And I can't take it anymore without showing it.
I am made of shit...

A long lost quote I heard long long ago has reminded me that "Shit has been around since the dawn of time." In some godly like voice... it occurs to me that shit is taken for granted...

I answered some random question on facebook that asked why people are annoying and I answered it with... "because people are aggressively clumsy and stupid."
We are the most powerful species of animal on planet earth and we love to flaunt and marvel at it.
We are also stupid...
Power and stupidity... are two very marvelous and fantastic things, and when we put them together... oh the joys that come around.

God made Adam out of mud... what is mud? Wet, Sloppy, long deceased animals, and animal waste and biproduct...

What is the bible telling us?
We are full of shit!

I will never understand how nasty people can be. How cruel and spiteful, bitter and hateful. Is it because they're bored? Is it because they think they are better? someone didn't love them?
Really it is a weakness unless you actually have power and some sort of reason. People are wasting they're time and won't get over things easily or they just lost hope of happiness I don't know but it's not right. I keep thnking about Anne Frank and how she said thought that people are really good at heart... I believe that but I don't know if I'm the one to bring it out in people... I wouldn't know what I was doing if I tried... I wish I could... it would make the world a lot better... I hate quacks, though.

Yes that is right this is now for friends only. Please comment to try to be accepted.

































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*under construction